Derek william Larsen Tribute

If tears could build a stairway
And memories were a lane,
I would walk right up to heaven
To bring you home again.
No farewell words were spoken.
Not enough time to say good-bye.
You were gone before we knew it,
And only God knows why.
My heart still aches in sadness
And secret tears still flow.
What it meant to lose you,
No one will ever know.
I miss you my crazy brother, especially now when I think all your sisters need you.

Hey you,
I have felt your presence around me so much lately. Its as if you hanging around knowing that I wish with all my heart you were here.
Mommy was diagnosed with cancer just over a month ago (I know you know - just be quiet and listen!) My heart has not been so sore since before I lost you. Dix if you could only have been here through this. I know that mommy has so much that she wants to say to you and i know she will get the chance when she sees you again but part of me thinks that is why she WANTS to go. I hate seeing mommy like this. It brings back ALL the memories of watching you die. I have relived those last 8 or 10months over and over again and it is killing me. The only difference this time is that it is Tons watching it everyday and not me. Tons is going through every emotion that I felt while I was walking this road with you and my heart breaks into millions of pieces for her. I know exactly how hard this is and i know exactly the fear she faces. Thank God she is stronger than i was. Thank God I walked that road or else i would not be able to support her through this. I will not let her be alone without us because i know how hard it was for me to walk this alone with you. I know you have 'visited' her from time to time and if you can, visit her again and let her know you are there. She needs all of us so much.
Mommy is hanging on because she knows what losing you did to us and she does not want us to hurt like that again. Mommy does not want to die just like you did not want to go. It hurts so much to watch her fade away before our very eyes. The only consolation for me is that she gets to see you again. She gets to tell you all the things she never got the chance to tell you while you were here. she misses you so much Dix. I miss you so much. Shan and tess are also taking major strain. This is the hardes thing for us having to watch our mommy die and in some ways i am grateful that you dont have to do it but selfishly I wish you were here for me. i wish I could feel your arms around me and hear you tell me its all going to be ok.
I met your grand daughter the other day. she has red hair! She is beautiful though. You would be so proud of your grandchildren. Little juandre is sooo cute and is getting big now. nathan is a beautiful baby as well. Your kids miss you and Sharnei has taken major strain over not having any link with you whatsoever. At least the other kids have pictures with you and they know you wanted them. This poor girl has nothing. I wish there had been a letter or something to them. Anyway, I guess they will all have their time with you one day.

I miss you Dix. Look after mommy when she comes home. I love you

Fats

As the moon continues to control the tides of the seas, as the stars appear every night in the deep black sky & as the sun rises on the top of hills & mountains everyday, so will my love for you continue in its eternity as God created. RIP my brother.

TImes have been so hard lately but i know that you are up there looking down on us and making sure we are all ok, i know chase has been missing you terribly but you dont have to worry we will take care of him and mom makes sure he is ok. she misses you too. I love you uncle Derek, send me an angel kiss so i can pass it on.

One of the funniest memories i have of you was on Daz' 16th birthday, we had a party at home for him and all his friends and "we Adults" were in my room chatting giving them their Privacy and we heard the music and you said you were going to dance and give them a show, you took my black and blue joker hat and we followed you into the lounge and true to your word you danced like a crazy man infront of daz and all his friends. we thought you would embaress him but they all thought you were so cool..

Thank you for bing the amazing uncle you were, never saying no to me when i needed a lift home from work no matter what time i finished or how tired you were you got into your car and said "hello my girl how was your Day??"

I love and miss you, and now we are finally a family all of us back together.

Kristyn and I had slept over at your place and we woke up early in the morning - Chase was still so little! I made you your morning tea which you said was the best cup of tea you had had in ages. While we sat around having tea you asked what we felt like doing that day and we all said we wanted to go to Gold Reef City for the day... and so you took us. We went on all the rides and had such an awesome day - the best ever. I miss you and love you Uncle D.