I have only just found this website. My mum died in a car accident in 2003. She moved to france for a new life, and six weeks later she was in a car accident and died instantly. She was only 47, she was beautiful, slim, pretty, everything. I will be 30 in a few days, and not a day goes by when I do not think of her. I recently gave birth to a son, and it seems very cruel because all my mum ever wanted was a little boy. I never got the chance to say goodbye to her, or even have a few minutes with her before or after the funeral. All I got was a phonecall from my step dad the day after the accident. I don't even know what happened at the day of the accident, or whether my mum has a memorial marker, because my step-dad won't tell me. I still have her last text message that she sent me saved onto my phone. I love her so much, and feel lost without her.
Sometimes, when I dream about everything being ok again, just before I am fully awake you get a few seconds where reality hasn't set in yet, you are still half dreaming. And those are the happiest off my life. Then you wake up properly and realise that it was all a dream. And it hurts so much.
My 10 year old daughter misses her terribly, too.
I wish she could have met my partner. All she ever wanted was for me to "Find a nice bloke and settle down, and be happy". She would have loved him, and got on with my soon to be mother-in-law so well. I feel so jealous sometimes, because my friends still have their mums. I want her to hold my new son and nibble his toes-she had an obsession with babies toes!
I go into Boots to smell the tester bottle of her favourite perfume, because I have nothing physical to remember her by. Everything of hers is still in France. I would give anything to have just one thing of hers to remember her by. But I don't even dare ask my step father because I don't want to upset him. Things have been strained between us since her death, even though I love him so much, so it is like I have lost both my parents. He treats me differently now, as if I am something he wants to sweep away.
Added May 2, 2008 By Littlebabylady
I have only just found this website. My mum died in a car accident in 2003. She moved to france for a new life, and six weeks later she was in a car accident and died instantly. She was only 47, she was beautiful, slim, pretty, everything. I will be 30 in a few days, and not a day goes by when I do not think of her. I recently gave birth to a son, and it seems very cruel because all my mum ever wanted was a little boy. I never got the chance to say goodbye to her, or even have a few minutes with her before or after the funeral. All I got was a phonecall from my step dad the day after the accident. I don't even know what happened at the day of the accident, or whether my mum has a memorial marker, because my step-dad won't tell me. I still have her last text message that she sent me saved onto my phone. I love her so much, and feel lost without her.
Sometimes, when I dream about everything being ok again, just before I am fully awake you get a few seconds where reality hasn't set in yet, you are still half dreaming. And those are the happiest off my life. Then you wake up properly and realise that it was all a dream. And it hurts so much.
My 10 year old daughter misses her terribly, too.
I wish she could have met my partner. All she ever wanted was for me to "Find a nice bloke and settle down, and be happy". She would have loved him, and got on with my soon to be mother-in-law so well. I feel so jealous sometimes, because my friends still have their mums. I want her to hold my new son and nibble his toes-she had an obsession with babies toes!
I go into Boots to smell the tester bottle of her favourite perfume, because I have nothing physical to remember her by. Everything of hers is still in France. I would give anything to have just one thing of hers to remember her by. But I don't even dare ask my step father because I don't want to upset him. Things have been strained between us since her death, even though I love him so much, so it is like I have lost both my parents. He treats me differently now, as if I am something he wants to sweep away.